For our Christmas parties at PADT we generally have over 40 employees so a traditional secret Santa gift exchange takes to long. So a couple of years ago we downloaded a right-left gift exchange story from the internet and it was a big hit. We ran out of stories on the internet, so we started writing our own, usually in some sort of over-the-top style. This year it was sort of a romance story with an Italian lover, a green dress, sword play, and a angry suitor. It takes place at Christmas time… so there is the rather weak tie to Christmas. If you have never played this game before it is simple. Everyone gets their gift and forms a big circle in the middle of the room. Someone with a strong voice reads the story and every the world LEFT is read, everyone passes the package they have to the left. Every time the world RIGHT is read, everyone passes the package they have to their right. You should pause a bit at each LEFT/RIGHT to give people a chance to pass. Using funny voices for the dialog also helps. We hope you get as many laughs out of it as we did. You can find our Film Noir style story from last year here.
Silvia LEFTwater lounged in her chair and watched Sir Robert St. RIGHTman stride across the portico, from LEFT to RIGHT into the LEFT wing of the LEFTwater mansion. She fluttered her eyes and inhaled a deep breath that stretched the bodice of her deep green satin dress. She held it for a time till it LEFT her a little light headed. She then let out a long, sad sigh.
“RIGHT now, based upon the sigh that just LEFT your body, I am guessing that your heart is once again RIGHT where I… last enjoyed your embrace.
Hearing Alberto’s voice coming from the doorway startled Silvia RIGHT out of her deep contemplation. During the summer they had enjoyed a brief, deep and passionate romance, stolen moments together RIGHT here in her Writeing study, that had LEFT her wanting more. If she was honest with herself, it had LEFT her devastated. But he had… gone away without saying a word, only WRITEing her a single note that explained he would return RIGHT before Christmas. She had moved on, or so she thought. She didn’t want to think about the complications that Alberto LEFT in his wake; she wanted to focus on Sir Robert RIGHT now.
“Alberto, it is such a pleasure to see you standing RIGHT here, you LEFT in such a hurry this summer.” She presented her RIGHT hand to him, which he took in both his LEFT and RIGHT hands, brushing his lips RIGHT against the top of her knuckles. “I am so glad you could be here for Christmas, it would not be RIGHT to celebrate it without you.”
Alberto looked down on her, gazing into her eyes in a way that LEFT her a bit breathless. “My dearest Silvia, you must be angry with me, and RIGHTly so. But it is now Christmas time and I want nothing LEFT to chance. So I have returned to RIGHT here, RIGHT now, to make things RIGHT. ”
Silvia felt her heart leap RIGHT out of her chest. He had LEFT her depressed and forlorn and now he marched RIGHT in at Christmas to declare something. And RIGHT after Sir Robert had LEFT this very same room after making a proposal of marriage. In fact, she realized that Sir Robert had declared his love to her standing in the same place Alberto stood now.
“Silvia, my peach, my desire, when I , LEFT here this summer I feel I did it for the RIGHT reasons. I bought property on the LEFT bank of the seine and opened an art auction house. And I sold pictures that my aunt had LEFT in plain sight, RIGHT above the LEFTmost window of our country estate. They were rare examples of the REITenhouser school of portraiture, painted by REITenhouser himself and his students. I sold them for a fortune, which has LEFT me with enough money to do RIGHT by you.”
Just then, Silvia saw Sir Robert over Alberto’s LEFT shoulder, standing in the door that had been LEFT open. His RIGHT eye twitched as his RIGHT hand slowly moved to his RIGHT hip where his sword was secured to his belt. “Alberto!” he yelled with RIGHTeous indignation. “By all that these mad days have still LEFT holy in this world, you have given up your RIGHT to Slivia’s attention. I have stood RIGHT by her side when you LEFT her crying, RIGHT here on this couch. Draw your sword, and we shall see who is LEFT standing!”
Alberto stood at attention, he looked RIGHT into Sir Robert’s eyes and said “You have LEFT me with no choice, we shall set this RIGHT….” He paused and drew his sword with his LEFT hand, for Alberto was not only Italian, he was a LEFTy, “… here and now”
And then they battled, back and forth, parry and thrust, thrust and parry. Silvia stood speechless, clutching her hands to her LEFT chest against her pounding heart. As the men fought, she was LEFT with a feeling of exhilaration. She knew it was… wrong… and not RIGHT, to find pleasure in their struggle. But she could not help herself. He chest heaved, covered with dewdrops of sweat as she watched them struggle.
Without warning, when they stood RIGHT in front of Silvia, Alberto slashed across Roberts LEFT cheek, which LEFT a long red streak under his eye. It also splashed blood RIGHT on Slivias RIGHT hip, RIGHT above her hand tooled leather belt.
“STOP THIS RIGHT NOW!!!” she shouted. Her outburst LEFT both men stunned and they stood there in front of her, looking RIGHT at her. “It is Christmas and this is not RIGHT. Although I am honored by your gallantry and willingness to fight for my love, the decision shall be LEFT to be to decide what is RIGHT for me.”
She took a deep breath and both men admired her long auburn hair, tied into a braid that sat on her RIGHT shoulder. She looked fierce, and beautiful. Then the word leapt RIGHT out from her “I love you Alberto, I always will. I would have rather you not LEFT me, and what you did was not RIGHT. But I forgive you. I’m sorry Sir Robert, it would be best if you LEFT now.”
Sir Robert dropped his sword and turned to leave. He walked through the door he had LEFT open only minutes before when he had LEFT after he had proposed to her, and walked down the hallway and… across the courtyard to his waiting carriage.
Which LEFT Silvia once again alone with Alberto, and it felt RIGHT. “Oh Alberto!” She felt his LEFT and RIGHT arms tight around her, which LEFT her no option but to collapse into his warm body. “This will be the Best Christmas Ever!” she said. Alberto leaned back and said. ” My Dear, Silvia, my love, my desire, my passion. You are…….. correct”
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- April 30, 20145th Digital Printing Presses Conference
- May 9, 2014ANSYS Converge, Santa Clara
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- May 22, 2014ANSYS Converge, Houston
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